Growing up too young?

I don’t know what to feel,
Or which way to go.
Life is getting harder,
Including my life at home.
Constant fights happening again,
Heads bashing like football linemen.
All our fights ending in tears,
My tears.
Crashing to the floor,
Consisting of all my fears.
Everything was going great,
No more fights,
But wait! What’s this?
Everything from my past is thrown back in my face,
Like a gang members fist.
This time with twice the pain,
Twice the force.
Tears falling down like razor blades,
Everything’s different,
Everything except for the source.
Spending the night
In my cold, grey, ’98 Saturn,
With tear stained cheeks,
The ache in my heart was returning.
Thinking out loud til 5 in the morning,
What did I do wrong this time?
Where was my warning?
How did I end up spending the night on my own?
Packed up and left,
And now I’m sitting here all alone.
But he told me to go!
He told me to leave!
I wanted to be on my own,
At least that’s what he believed.
Now that I know what it’s like to be on my own,
I have to decide it I want to go back home.
Do I want to go back to the face to face brawls,
Ending with me making tear streaming phone calls?
Do I want the feeling of security –
Of a roof over my head?
Or do I want to create my own,
And be with out a warm bed?
Why should I go back,
When all I try to do is obey?
He told me to leave,
So I obeyed.
I packed my bag and ran down the stairway.
But he is still angry with me,
Why?
I have no idea because all I did was obey him,
And once again it’s my tears that I’m trying to swim in.
I have no where to go,
No one to turn to,
And the song of my life is still unsung.
So I’m going to head back home,
Because I guess you just can’t
Grow up too young.