I nearly choked on my own spit while I was trying to read this aloud.

Jenn

Soft and faint, my name leaves a smile on my face during casual introductions. It is a name of comfort in how every person I meet cannot read my soul by hearing it. Jenn means playmate or a mom to play house with. Jenn is easy and fun to call you. Jennifer, being the most common name possible seemed to fit just right. But many who know you would have never names you something so insignificant. A shield comes to mind when i think of my name because I have always been able to hide behind its common nature. "Jenn" is truly who I am... Appearing ordinary and timid but suprisingly more uncommon. My name doesn't burden me the way that other names could. I don't know another girl who wears her name the way that I do. Inside me lies fire, but my undersized name acts as water to anyone who doesn't look too closely. I wonder how much overcompensating I do in trying to be the biggest person I can and fighting off such a monotonous name. Jenn has always meant my biggest specialest friend who I will always look forward to seeing. I wish your name was spoken more often because then I would know that I would see you more. If you looked up my name in the dictionary you would read "soft cheeked and fair." If you looked up my name in its correspondence to my life you would read crazy, free spirited, mellow, loving, and grounded. It would mean sacrifice, selflessness, and trust. However, if my name meant all of these things to the naked eye, I believe I would feel vulnerable and threatened. Threatened, that every person who met me, would know that my heart was soft and harmless. My name would unlock any and all of my mystery. We named you Jennifer because we wanted to protect you.

Approaching your senior year

Okay Okay Okay... Im sure its been said a thousand times by now to make your senior year count. The real question here is have you fully grasped the concept of that statement. This year if you do one thing worthwhile let it be a deeper look into the real person that you are. Self discovery is one of lives greatest privledges. Don't be who your friends think you are at parties or that girl who agrees with everyone in order to be liked by all. Amaze yourself and truly reach out to others. Don't talk behind others backs just because you can and don't analyze other peoples lives because its simply entertaining. Understand that this is your last year of true childhood. Take it or leave it but don't underestimate the power of regret. Regret you may feel a few years from now may not be fixable. Live this year like you mean it. I wish I felt like the message of this bloc would truly be taken in and understood but honestly I don't know that if I read it I would understand or really care what it said. Its just simply one persons opinion on what should be accomplished during this last year of high school. Take it as friendly advice. Advice from someone whose living it with you. Advice from someone who feels like they have blown a lot of their high school experience for the sake of wanting out. Now that were all here it seems more real. Honestly, the winds have shifted and I find myself wanting to stay here in our last year of high school forever. I know the future is bright for most of us who gave a crap in high school, but for those of us who didn't... What becomes of your futures? Make this year count... Let it make up for all the years that you didn't give it your all or all the years when you could have been a better person to all who knew you. Or even just that one day that you could have been a better friend. Columbine High School blows my mind with all of the love and support most of us share with one another. Lets keep it that way and make it stronger. Man.. What a bunch of rambling. I should really end this before I start believing that this may change anything.

Lonely

http://www.geocities.com/kalikiki/leyba.index.html

And

And

how does a teacher even try And reach her
poisoning her future with synthetic pleasure
and I measure and measure the time wasted against
a spoonful of treasure that temporary pleasure
that lives for a second under the stars
making decisions right now
that don’t meet tomorrow anyhow
and I feel like I’m pullin’ a plow through the bog of youth
and screamin’ “hey here’s the truth”
and then he looks away and says what’s for lunch
and the car rolls at lunch and everyone crawls out
the window hole and hides the cans and worries
about the scar for senior pictures tomorrow
and econ notes blow down the fairway to bed, bath, and beyond
and now who is gonna drive tonight cuz its senior year
and we gotta do it right
and she walks alone in her pom gear
that she dreamed about all last year
and now she’s alone as she passes him who’s alone
the pale kid with chains hanging off his soul
cuz she doesn’t know he’s breathin but that’s cool
cuz I’m gonna be somebody even if my dad don’t drive a boxster
and nobody chants “we are” anymore cuz one foots out the door
while he’s making it happen and she’s watching it and clappin
and they walk back with smoke in their hair and wonder what just happened
and they fight in the hall cuz that’s how we show affection
and Chris has three p.e.s but you can’t’ have more than one English
but I watched three movies and it was like so sub-ish

How to be a Parent

Every laugh, smile, frown, tear, they're all there. Lingering in your heart. You see that precious little face in your sleep. You breathe and live your life knowing that they're all right. They're your little angel. Your EVERYTHING! Your child. They're a part of you today, tomorrow, and from now on. What would you do if something happened to them? Would you sit back and watch? No way! You would be there from something as little as a small scratch to clean, kiss, and bandage. You'll be there from the first day of preschool, until their highschool graduation. They're your child, your responsibility. So, for every laugh, smile, frown, and tear, you'll be there. Your the parent, they're the child. You're their hero!

What should I write?

Write your thoughts. Exchange Ideas. Post journal entries. Ask questions. Share your writing. What did we do today?