Jenn.. Exposed. (Incentive to read the blog)

This is something I put together after the birth of my son. For those of you who didn't know that I was pregnant. These are some of the moments I tried to capture during the adoption.



Dim lights surround a chaotic scence
My defining moments are staring down my back
Life is halted while trials are showcased
The meaning of life is starting to take shape.

Baking in the warmth of his small helpless body
His life is predestined and I am simply a messenger
Each breath of life screams obedience and trust in a higher power
He is my greatest accomplishment.
Yet my heart will always break for him

The lights calm and the setting surreal
The soft scents of newborn and formula swallow me whole
His soft whimper makes me understand.
I now realize that love has never meant anything.

Its a bit brighter now and we are hiding together.
Its safe and no one can find us
My family has taken shape
the 3 of us lay untouchable together.
I will take apart these moments and suffocate myself in them.

Desperate.
My body called to him in ways it felt unnatural to fight.
Sacrifice became real and goals became reachable.
While walking with the lord, he held me to his chest
the way I had held my son.
"I lived this" I scream.

Suddenly, my life has meaning like it never had before.
A level of selflessness is obtained
and I will take each blessing Ive earned.
Changing the lives of others is something worth living for.
My sons changed everyone who knew of him.

Embracing him, wanting him, needing him.
I simply lived for him
Now he is an example of what can be done in one person
to complete something bigger.
I have walked through heaven and now I am simply living.

I love him, I loved him, and he gave me back each day I sacrificed in one tiny breath.


This is personal but I hope people read this. CHOOSE LIFE.